7 Secrets For Having the Perfect Romantic Valentine’s Day

There’s nothing romantic about a surprise that flops!

Seriously, we’ve all had those moments where the surprise just falls flat…maybe ‘crickets’ silence or a struggle for composure. Often ending in tears, embarrassment, frustration and disappointment.

It happens.

I’ve seen it, I’ve experienced it and I’m guessing you have too. So whether you are the giver or the receiver here are my 7 TOP strategies you can use to make sure your Valentine’s Day or heck any special day…stays special!

#1 Setting the stage is critical to the outcome.

Why? It’s important to YOU and you are important to THEM, likewise THEY are important to YOU and you BOTH want each other to feel the LOVE.

Make the time, make the effort to get you both on the same page.

#2 Don’t assume, neither of you are mind readers.

One of the BIGGEST mistakes couples make is making their partner guess or pick up on your clues, which are really a test that your partner isn’t aware is happening.

Instead, let’s increase the odds from 50/50 to 100% by getting clear on what you would like, mapping it out while staying flexible to their ideas too. You aren’t doing ‘their work’. Just flip your focus and interpretation here for a moment. It is very sexy and an important part of a successful relationship to share your inner wishes, desires with your partner and let them fulfill those desires!

#3. Plan ahead together.

Be specific, ask quality questions and map the ‘everything’ out. Together you can both decide the who, what, where and compare notes on things like finances or schedules. Successful couples get the details out of the way. What day? (after all it’s not easy to juggle real life with the goal of a romantic time together). What time? (babysitter or not). Budget? Homemade gifts & notes…a surprise bubble bath or home cooked meal…priceless!

#4. Romantic surprises aren’t really that romantic.

You want a perfect romantic fall? This guessing (aka) test has all the makings of a flop. No one wants to fail! Once you make them guess and they miss YOUR target they fail and it really is a fun sucking moment.

Let go of the social media comparison, enjoy yourselves in a romantic time together, based on your needs, their needs and your relationship’s goals. Keep it on track and on the plan for where you both want to be…tomorrow and everyday after.

#5. Use Quality Questions.

What’s the big deal and what is a quality question?!

 It’s actually a really big deal in knowing the difference between a question and a quality question, so here’s two examples to get you started. Put in a little time doing your own work before you ask them. Asking focused, well thought out questions start with knowing what you want to know from your partner or spouse.

Quality Questions are specific if you have an end goal or request in mind.

“Valentine’s day is coming up and I want to avoid the crowds and food sticker shock. Would that be okay with you too? We could cook a meal or have something delivered.”

Quality Questions can be open ended if you want to hear their opinion, perspective, preference or just get general ideas and brainstorm together.

“Valentine’s Day is coming up on Tuesday. I wanted to know how you’d like to celebrate it. What are your thoughts?”

Can you see the difference between these two quality questions?

#6. How Do You Write a New Love Story?

What does your LOVE story look like? Is it optimistic, filled with joy and love or destined for disappointment, feeling let down and neglected…. Your narrative, the thoughts, expectations, the whispers of guilt or anticipation all come together and write your love story…even before it begins.

If you aren’t satisfied with the love in your relationship — you can rewrite it. Toss the old one (keeping your partner) and start showing up differently. You will rewrite the script of your relationship’s love story.

#7. Dealing with Disappointment.

Life isn’t fair sometimes and it’s often just plain hard. Even the most important people make mistakes, or miss the cues…so understand that when we are vulnerable or something is super important to us and our Very Important Person (VIP) lets us down…it is going to hurt deeper than a random person.

Successful couples know that they and their partner will have conflicts, disappointments, that’s just part of the relationship life cycle. What they do about the disappointments is different. They don’t sweep it under the rug. They talk about it, make repairs and move forward together.

If you’d like to hear more details about my 7 strategic ways to make your Valentine’s Day a success, just click on the link and watch my YouTube video where I do a deeper dive into just how you both can make this a day to remember!

💖Here’s the link: https://youtu.be/gYdqvCkCrrM

Here’s to your Happy Valentine’s Day Success!

 

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