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How much energy really is in your marriage or relationship?!

November 27, 2019

Busy couples often overlook themselves and their marriage or relationship. Life gets full really fast with careers, commutes , critters and other job and family commitments…and the relationship really runs out of energy and interest. Funny thing is cars and relationships and marriages have something in common…both have a “fuel level” indicator, they just look different. Cars come equipped with fancy dash indicators, lights and warning sounds to avoid running out of gas. Relationships and marriage warning lights look a bit different. These “fuel indicators” come on when you’d prefer to hang out with friends or work longer at the office, distancing, lack of interest in each other…emotional or physical affairs. Check out your energy level and learn a few tips to refill the “tank”.

 

Transcription: (rough transcription for your use)

Hi guys, it’s Dr. Liz Jenkins here. Hey, I have a quick question. I wanted to find out, do you know what kind of energy is in your relationship when you think about your marriage or your relationship? What do you feel? Is it kind of blah or is it electric and you’re, you know, you’re looking forward to seeing each other at the end of the day. Um, when you send those text messages to each other, I hope you are sending or calling or sending emails and keeping in touch with your sweetheart. But when you send them, are they filled with, gee, I love you, I appreciate you. Let’s do something fun. Or is it more of like, cat threw up on the carpet today when you’re getting home? Uh, got a call from the school for the kids. What is the energy? What is the tone? Um, when you reach out to each other or when your loved one reaches out to you? Because it’s very, very common for couples to go from being extremely energy, energetic and excited about seeing each other. To have that slowly fade from the infatuation on the early stages into more of a routine, um, day to day kind of thing. And my challenge to you is to one first kind of get our a, of a measure on the vibe that you guys have. Do we sort of just go around in the routine in the rut or are we really shaking things up and looking forward to being together or looking forward to, um, planning fun surprises with each other? And if you find which a lot of couples do, so, so please, it’s no harm, no foul, no shame, no blame here. Okay. But if you find that you’ve sort of settled into rot or sort of blah, um, that I’m giving you a homework assignment, a challenge, what I’m suggesting is that you find one thing to surprise your spouse with one thing to, um, spark up the energy. Maybe it’s a, you know, a quick swing by the market. Pick up a, some flowers. Okay. Or their favorite tea. Maybe it’s a you, you go get some food and when they walk through the door, you’ve made dinner. Or are you kind of like kidnap them and take them away and say, we’re going to go for a walk. We’re going to go for a picnic. Doesn’t really matter. Maybe you buy the book, the favorite books or ah, some massage oil or some lotion is that, Hey, sit down. I’m gonna rub your feet. Okay? It doesn’t matter what you do, it matters that you are thinking and you are doing something towards them. So that’s bringing energy into a relationship. It’s bringing energy and attention to your spouse. And nine times out of 10, they’re going to acknowledge it. They’re going to appreciate it, and it’s going to have some kind of reciprocal benefit. They’re gonna feel softer towards you. They’re going to look for ways to surprise you or do nice things for you. Okay? So that’s it. Just a simple thing today. Take a read on the energy and the vibes that you’re getting in your marriage or relationship and see what you can do to amp it up. Take care and talk to you later. Bye.

 

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